I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You can't just leave with hair like that
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
