i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I am full of burrito and curiosity
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You ruined the universe
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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