But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
