I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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