3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Randomize
