I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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