New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize