So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
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I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
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Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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