During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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