Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
