im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Randomize
