Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(973): View more from New Jersey

so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement

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(320): View more from Minnesota

You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.

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(607): View more from New York

he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.

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(480): View more from Arizona

I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours

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(303): View more from Colorado

I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college

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(303): View more from Colorado

Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude

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(817): View more from Texas

I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children

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(360): View more from Washington

That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.

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