What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize