just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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