don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
