Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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