they're staring at me
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
she looked like the before picture.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?