so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Randomize
