That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize