so that wasnt chicken after all
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
