idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
