ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize