Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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