Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
