I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Randomize
