your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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