Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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