I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize