My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize