Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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