it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
