they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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