i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
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Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
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Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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