Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+27): View more from South Africa

I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.

(+27): View more from South Africa

I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.

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(707): View more from California

you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!

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(239): View more from Florida

Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet

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(937): View more from Ohio

Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.

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(518): View more from New York

Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.

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(404): View more from Georgia

This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"

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(248): View more from Michigan

Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward

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(773): View more from Illinois

Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?

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