I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!