I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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