So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
