i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize