He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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