WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
