I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
