it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize