is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My butt remains clenched, sir.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
