New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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