You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
