on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
