Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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