I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
