If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
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i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
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Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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