...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
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