I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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