I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
