this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
