dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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